Tuesday, March 10, 2015

All About Women

Happy International Women's Day!! What a perfect time to celebrate. I spent the weekend on the anniversary of my Mom's passing with several strong and wonderful women who helped mold and shape the person I am and celebrated my mom- a woman who taught me unconditional love and the kind of woman I want to be. I'm also at a crossroads in a relationship where I'm wondering what the balance of compromise is: when is it not enough and when is it too much?

And just as it always does, Life provides an answer. I was scrolling through Facebook this morning as I was getting ready and came across a post from Nuno Bettencourt. If you're into 80s metal bands you'll recognize this gorgeous rocker. If not, you'll want to. He posted the following statement: 'Strong women don't play victim, don't make themselves look pitiful, and don't point fingers. They stand and they deal.' I agree with every word but it's what he said to preface that moved me:

"Ladies… today is International Women's Day. 
It's your day to be celebrated, recognized, and acknowledged. But for all of us men, it has to be every day that we celebrate you. 
Guys… the real power of a man is in the size of the smile of the woman sitting next to him… show your love and admiration for your girl, your woman, your mom every chance you get. They are your equal and need to be respected as your equal. Kiss them every chance you get. Squeeze them really hard. Don't take them for granted…
Empower them and they will empower you back. Cheers to all the amazing women around the world!
#internationalwomen'sday #partners #powerful #love #admiration"

Can I just add a couple of hashtags to the mix? #Loveitandloveyou!! #madrespect #wherearethemenwhothinkthisway?? #goodheavensareyousingle?

Okay, so I don't have the whole hashtag thing down but I do know how amazing it was to come across that post. I read it to my sister and she was impressed, calling it a rare example of emotional maturity. It made me question whether emotional maturity is an innate and therefore inevitable point for people to come across or whether this is a chosen and/or hard-won path. 

I would think that Life's curve balls would force one into maturity but then Wendi pointed out several examples of people of all ages- people we know very well- that never reached it and probably never will. This is a humbling lesson and also a wake up call. If you are surrounded by people that are emotionally immature, i.e. they don't compromise, they're full of absolutes, they run from problems or adversity, they are close-minded... they may just stay that way. Eek! 

I think the only thing I have going for me is that I do change. I try to learn from my  many (add *gasp*) many mistakes and grow from them. I can't imagine a life where you are so set in fear of the unknown that you remain stagnant or worse, regress.

Therefore it is even more impressive that this guy is out there celebrating women and taking the time to empower others. So I would like to take this moment to toast Nuno (choose adult beverage of your choice... mine will be an 18-year-old Bunnahabhain) and to say how much I appreciate the standard you set for all men. SlĂ inte!

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